Updates and clarification!

Well here is the update as uneventful as it may be- We are still waiting for our appointment for our home study. From what I understand the home study takes about 8 weeks and then we file a form with the government to basically get permission to adopt internationally. While we wait on permission we will prepare our dossier so that it can be sent to Cliff's country to be translated. Then they will give us a travel date to go meet him. I am not allowed to specifically name what country Cliff is from but can tell you it is in Eastern Europe. We have a couple of options when the time comes for travel. We can go for 3 weeks and attend court for Cliff to be officially ours, then come home for a mandatory 10 day wait then fly back to pick him up or we can stay approximately 5 weeks straight. Each has pros and cons and we have yet to decide which way economically makes sense for us.

Now for the clarification and sorry if I ramble on but something was posted today on facebook and it did upset me and I am going to call this person out a little bit. I won't post his name but instead will call him Mr. Miserable. I actually copied the conversation and will post it exactly as he typed it so he gets full credit for the spelling and grammar :) I am doing this because sadly I know he is probably not alone in his thinking and I did realize that some people would not understand our choices so for those people I am going to explain things. So here goes and hope you can follow along:
Background- a friend just shared Cliffs page on her wall in hopes that maybe someone would want to consider helping us out.

• ok one problem with this.. if they can afford to adopt then they shouldn't...and trying to get money from others to adopt, not right..can't afford to adopt a down baby, then how are they gonna take care of one? Beg for more money? use the state welfare system, yes I have a problem with this. Yes the child need a loving home but also needs one that can afford to take care of him/her without assitants...

Mr. Miserable, First of all we are not talking about a down baby! Has someone ever taught you people first language? There are income guidelines set in place for every adoption- if you do not meet the guidelines you do not adopt. I am not asking for assistance in padding my bank account. What I asked is that people donate to a recognized charity which is a tax deduction. Those funds are used to help offset the high costs of Cliff's adoption. How am I going to take care of him? Very well thank you. I have 4 great kids already without any assistance. Although I am in the market for a maid if you are available ;)
My dear friend then attempted to explain that we already had a child with Ds.....

 yes I seen that, my point is if they can't afford to adopt then they shouldn't and because they have one mean they deserve another one? no.. Yes I'm harsh but life and truth is harsh.

  Mr. Miserable- I firmly believe every family deserves a child with Ds. More importantly every child deserves a family. Sad reality is that children are discarded on a whim based on events that were out of their control. That is life and that is the truth.

Ok so your getting a baby from abroad, that isn't a US citizen but will become one and because he's disabiled he will get from our govnt, social security disabilty and medicade or medicare...and if theirs a waiting list for american kids,I would like to think that you'd wait for one of "our" needy children from this country.but hey our govnt sends money to all these other countries and don't care about it's own people so why should the people of that same govnt be any different...yes it's sad..

Mr. Miserable- None of your business but my son does not get any disability or state medical assistance. Plus with your confidence in our government it seems that there won't be any social security left after our government sends all this money to other countries. And I fully intend to provide for them as long as they need it. Yes, there is a waiting list for children with Ds in our country. See that is where it is tricky- we are a country that does not toss aside children born with disabilities however we are a country that is so advanced in our prenatal testing that 90% of women who find out they are carrying a child with Ds aborts. Now THAT is sad. So you would like me to wait for "our" needy children who may or may not be born rather than save a child already born?

I am sorry if I come across as snotty or rude right now. My intention is pure and simple. I am not doing this to make any sort of money. I am doing this because there is a little boy waiting for me, for us his family to get to him and bring him home. Mr. Miserable if that makes me selfish as you say then I am guilty. I have prayed long and hard over this and I have to do what is needed to be his voice and if you call it begging then so be it.

Honestly I have to believe that Mr. Miserable is in the minority. I have to believe that with all my heart. Thanks for letting me vent....